The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming your Fear
Last read March 15, 2017
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Highlights
14 highlights.
To summarize, fear is an emotional reaction to an immediate danger, whereas anxiety is a state of apprehension about some future threat.
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Anxiety and fear are time-limited. Even though they feel as though they may continue forever, they always decrease over time.
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the physical aspects of social anxiety (uncomfortable feelings and sensations), the cognitive aspects of social anxiety (anxious thoughts, expectations, predictions), and the behavioral aspects of social anxiety (for example, avoidance of social situations).
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In other words, when you feel anxious, you should pay attention to what you feel, think, and do.
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experiencing these symptoms is not the problem. Rather, it is your beliefs about the meaning and possible consequences of these symptoms that contributes to your social anxiety.
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people don’t react emotionally to the situations and events in their lives. Rather, they react to their beliefs and interpretations concerning these events and situations.
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The longer you put off an unpleasant task, the harder it is to start the task when you finally decide to do it.
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In the case of perfectionism, however, the standards are so high and so inflexible that they actually interfere with performance by causing a person to overprepare for tasks (for instance, spending hours rehearsing a presentation), procrastinate (such as putting off preparing for a presentation), or be overly critical of his or her own performance.
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If you avoid a social situation following a traumatic experience, you may increase your chances of developing a fear of that situation.
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When presented with an ambiguous social situation (for example, a stare from someone else or a phone call that isn’t returned), people with elevated social anxiety have a heightened tendency to interpret the situation negatively.
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Remembering being teased in high school, while forgetting about the good times spent with friends after school
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The problem with the beliefs and thoughts associated with social anxiety is not necessarily that they are untrue (although sometimes they are), but rather that they are held in an exaggerated and inflexible way.
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If you don’t take risks, you will never be rejected—but you will also never experience the benefits of taking social risks, including improved relationships, a better job, and other possible rewards.
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Express yourself and take a chance on engaging in an exciting dialogue.
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